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All the lonely coders, where do they all belong?
This week, to round off our Beatles lyrics competition, we bring you two correspondents who, unlike many of our readers, provide lyrics for Eleanor Rigby that actually scan. Next week we’ll be selecting three for our shortlist, so if you have a favourite, email us before the weekend to nominate it. Then you vote, the winner gets the bubbly, and everyone’s happy. Except the heroes of our songs this week.
First, Kieran Wareing, at Norsk Data: ‘Eleanor Rigby clicks with the mouse on her laptop but nothing appears/Sheds a few tears/Waiting for Windows, server to show her the files that she needs for Excel/MS is hell/Call support for PCs/And wait another day/My Mac is the bees’ knees/Results without delay.’
And a second entry from Alastair Muirhead: ‘Old Cobol coder sits in an office behind the development team/Lives in a dream/What is she doing? Going over code she wrote back in seventy four/Who was it for?/All the Cobol coders/Where did they all come from?/All the Cobol coders/Where do they now belong?/IT director thinking about the old days when he coded in Plan/Who gives a damn?/Look at him working, balancing budgets at night when there’s nobody there/Losing his hair’. If Lennon and McCartney were writing today, these are the subjects they would be taking on.
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