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The early berg catches the stern

Happy new year! We hope you survived unscathed and all that kerfuffle over your behaviour at the annual Christmas party has died down. We start the year, as we intend to proceed, with a pointless correction to a very silly story.
‘Your correspondent John Blenkinsop claims that if lard were the tip of the iceberg, the Titanic would not have sunk. He forgets that the Titanic was holed below the waterline,’ says Jason Mills, at Moorhead High School. ‘Therefore, a composite iceberg with a lard tip certainly could have, and for all we know may have, caused the disaster.’

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