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To baldly go

We bring relief to those of you who are silently wondering what on Earth you can do about the curse of male pattern baldness while at work.
Research by scientists at Jena University, Germany, shows that some balding men can be treated with caffeine to delay hair loss. There are two ways to accomplish this: either drink between 60 and 80 cups of coffee a day or, more practically for those of you who have to spend at least some time at your desk, smear coffee directly on to your scalp.
Of course, if you do this with a sideways motion, it will have the added benefit of sticking your comb-over more securely to your head as well.

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